GIDDY :)

July 11, 2009 - Leave a Response

Friday night…I had ANOTHER wonderful date with Ziggy. Did I mention how much I enjoy being in his presence?? He’s like everything I’ve always requested for from God and more. We did dinner and a movie again…there’s not really much to do in Amarillo. Bruno was the most interesting movie I’ve ever seen in my life and I still cannot believe it’s rated R…it needs to be rated NC-17 or X rated. It’s very disturbing. Anyways after the movie we went back to his place for more “us” time. I love being his arms and he just kisses me all over…Gah he’s SOOOO great!!!! Oh yes and we also established that we’re dating :) , which makes me even more excited!!! So I’m happy and keep smiling everywhere I go.

CIMG0005**US (I look bad but he looks great…anyways I like us together)**

Today’s my last day in Amarillo and I’m kinda sad because I don’t wanna leave my mommy. Actually every time I come here I don’t wanna leave her. Keep my mom in your prayers..my strength that’s what she is.

Off to bed! I’m extremely tired!

XOXO!

BEST I EVER HAD!!!

July 10, 2009 - Leave a Response

So I finally arrived to Amarillo! I was so happy to return home to my beautiful mother and also spend time with my Ziggy! :) As soon as I got home, my mom got me food then I passed out for like 3 hours. (I only got 2 hrs of sleep the night before) Then I woke up helped my mom move a freezer for her friends and then date night!!!

Where to start…

We went to Texas Roadhouse which was very good and we got the star treatment. Then we went to the park and walked around and watched the sunset. (THIS IS DEFINITELY MY FAVORITE THING TO DO!) Then we went and saw The Proposal, cutest date movie ever. Like it’s funny but had me in tears and then by the end of the movie I was in tears because I was laughing so hard. After the movie we went back to his house for more “us” time. This is definitely the best date I’ve had so far in my life and I hope there are more to come.

I just enjoy ever moment I spend with him and I pray pray (DEAR LORD) please let a relationship or whatever you want to come out of this but I really really hope for a relationship. Well I’m off to figure out what I’m going to do today and plan more things for me & Zig to do.

XOXO!

SO EXCITED!

July 8, 2009 - Leave a Response

I’m leaving LA today. The trip was all that I wanted it to be, however I met a cute boy to spend some of my time with so that’s always nice. SIDENOTE: During the moments when I’m sad and down worrying if I will ever find someone to be with or if I just need to start reminding myself that God made me BEAUTIFUL (inside & out) and I will find someone so be patient. Actually my cousin & other friends have been telling me this but ya know it takes me awhile to catch on and listen to things. NOW BACK TO THE POSTING: Anyways I return to Austin tonight to pack again and go to Amarillo to see my boo! ;) I’m super excited because I usually see him during Christmas break and May but things changed this year and it’s been since Christmas break that I’ve seen him. I was upset and missed him much but I’m extremely excited to see him!! I told him I was going to jump all over him when we reunite! I’m also stressing because I have a project that’s due tomorrow and I have no clue how I’m going to turn it because my flight is like at 9 in the morning. Hopefully it all works out…just pray!

Well now I’m going to pack up and get ready to leave this city. I thought I would put LA on one of my potential cities so live BUT I really really enjoy the snow. Weird right my family’s from Guyana and I like snow??!! It doesn’t make sense at all. This will just be a nice vacationing spot for me & my boy to visit during the summer or something like that, nothing permanent though.

XOXO!

Setting Standards.

July 7, 2009 - Leave a Response

Currently I’m reading Steve Harvey’s book, “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man”. It’s taught me a lot about what the male gender thinks and how/why they do the things they do. It’s also taught me how to change my behavior so I won’t end up in destroyed relationships.

So far my favorite chapter has been about being a Sport Fish vs. Keeper. The chapter actually brought me to tears because when Steve Harvey was describing the characteristics of a keeper it reminded me of myself. Maybe that’s why I teared up…who knows I’m a girl and I’m just over emotional. Like right now I’m crying as I listen to Ne-Yo’s song, “Part of the List” over & over & over & over again.

So the chapter I’m on now is talking about standards I have set for the people that I will potentially date. I’ve decided why not, answer the questions, and express them with the people that read my blog.

1. What specific kind of man are you looking for?

I want a man who loves God more than anything on this world. I also want him to love his mother and know how to treat women. I want him to be athletic, tall, supportive, sweet, and willing to serve the Lord as much or even more than God blesses him (if that makes sense…meaning if my husband is a professional athlete he needs to be a deacon in church). Smart and definitely be able to carry on more than a 5 minute conversation about sports. I want him to enjoy me and love me just as much as I enjoy and love him.

2. How do you expect to be pursued?

Daily text messages are nice..I understand if a guy is busy but I like to know that he’s thinking about me. I like talking on the phone too but I’m more in person than “caking” on the phone til the wee hours of the night. If we live in the same time I’d want us to see each other at least once a day. Oh and make sure to include at least 3-4 date nights in the week. I understand people are busy because I’m a busy gal also but I want to know that my man is being just as flexible as I will be to see him.

3. What level of commitment do you expect?

I’m not too much the fan of open relationships…those are a waste of time. I want full commitment meaning you only want me and I only want you. I have no time for a wandering eye or the “wannabe playa” that was definitely high school and I’ve grown up since then.

4. What kind of financial security do you expect this man to have?

Well….sorry fellas you’ll have to blame my daddy. He’s definitely treated me to the finer things in life and taught me how a woman should be treated. Money isn’t everything but I want my husband to be able to support my needs, many of my wants, and also be there for my outlandish dreams. I need a hard-worker, someone who is willing to make sacrifices and do what it takes to support me and our family. I’m definitely not a gold digger and I will work to help my husband (I couldn’t be a housewife I will go crazy); however, I don’t want it all to depend on me. I need/want help!

5. Do you want a man who wants kids and is family oriented?

Definitely! My family is very important to me and I want my man to enjoy his family/my family as much as I do. He also needs to love kids because I love children (I’m going to be a teacher) and I get attached really easy. I also hope to have children of my own so liking children is a MUST!

6. Does he have to be religious/spirtual?

Uhh duh! I’m a God-fearing woman seeking a God-fearing man. If you’re not into God or Christianity I can’t date you…it won’t EVER work.

7. Do you mind if he’s a divorcé or has kids?

Hmmm well for the age I’m at right now…I do mind because I would like to be with someone who has no attachments like we’re starting off on a clean slate together.

8. Can you help a man build his dream? Can you adapt to his plan?

I can and will as long as he has a definite plan which includes short and long term goals. I am spontaneous when needed but I try to gain control and put things into perspective. Adapting to his plan of course…I’ll follow my man wherever he goes! I’m a teacher so finding a job around the U.S. or in a different country wouldn’t be that hard.

9. What do you expect of his family?

I hope he gets along with his mother…not a mama’s boy BUT gets along with his mother. I also hope his family likes me, that’s always a big nervous point of mine. My family is and never will be perfect so I definitely do not expect his to be. I just hope they’re proud of the son they’ve raised and how he’s turned out to be.

10. What should he be willing to do to woo you?

Hmmm I’m simple. I like nice things but it’s the little things that go along way with me. Like cards, letters, flowers, messages, emails, etc. I’ve always told myself the boy that takes me on a picnic with peanut butter & jelly AND blue powerade is the boy that I’m going to spend the rest of my life with!

So every time I read a new chapter (I try to read one chapter a day) I ask myself is this something I knew before reading. I also engage in discussions about the chapter. I’ve been told several times to throw this book away and just go with the flow. It’s hard when you’re alone because you want to do whatever’s right and act perfect so you can find “THE ONE”. I’ll just continue praying just like I do every night, be patient, and hope God sends me “MY ONE”.

XOXO!

PS-I’m going to Michael Jackson’s memorial tomorrow…I’m uber excited!!!

CHANGE!

July 6, 2009 - Leave a Response

I made some change to my “what’s important to me in my life”. Actually I updated pictures, added more people, and deleted a few. Feel free to look & enjoy!

XOXO!

**HEAR YE, HEAR YE**

July 6, 2009 - Leave a Response

WOW!! So I haven’t updated my blog in FOREVER! I’ve been busy with school, internships, family, and putting my life together.

Let’s see I turned 21 two days ago! I’m so happy to finally be legal…it’s EXCITING! My birthday night was crazy!!

CIMG0026**A snapshot of my night..PURE CRAZINESS**

And now I’m in LA. My friends surprised me with a trip here. I’m excited, happy, and very thankful for the friends that I have and for also being in this amazing city. This could be one of the future destinations for Carissa…who knows though??!!

HMM what else is going on in my life??? Oh yes my best friend…Kathryn Rose Clark (now Webb) got married. It was one of the most beautiful weddings I have seen lately.

CIMG0025**THE BEAUTIFUL BRIDE & GROOM**

I’m happy and envious of them. Kathryn finally found the special person on Earth God made for her. I’m hoping to find that person. I’m about to start crying again. I’ve become really emotional lately because I’m always worrying about whether or not I’ll be able to find that one person that is meant for me. My cousin tells me not to worry and have fun with life but it’s still always in the back of my mind. If you keep up with my blog you’ll know I’m a person that does not like being alone and I really really really do not want to be single forever…I just don’t think I’m strong enough of that. BUT maybe God has something different planned for me…..

My school is GREAT! I love my major more & more each and every day.  I can’t wait to be a teacher and also have my own classroom. I’ve realized I might actually be a kindergarten or first grade teacher. Crazy right?? I love little kids and I feel like I can work with them better. This summer I worked in a pre-1st ESL room and I love every moment of it. I like singing, dancing, and just watching them enjoy learning and every thing that comes out of my mouth. 1 MORE YEAR and I’m outta college!! I can’t wait! Right now I’m trying to decide what I’m going to do with my life and what city I want to go to. Constant prayer is all I need…just stay focused on the prize and path Jesus has for me.

I think I’ve pretty much updated you on the HIGH points of my life. I’m pretty sure there are things that have happened to me on a daily basis but they don’t matter as much. God is constantly blessing me and I’m ever so thankful for all that he does.  know I take it for granted but I’m learning how to only look at the ups and forget about the lows. And my relationship with him is getting better and I’m learning how to treat him as a best friend instead of a close companion.

Well I’m off…I’ll try to keep updating more frequently since I’m not as busy this part of the summer. Hopefully this somewhat catches you up on my life! Good morning dear readers!

XOXO!

CIMG0011_2**BIRTHDAY SWEET POTATO PIE…YUMM!!!**

Words from the wonderful Audrey Hepburn

April 7, 2009 - Leave a Response

For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.

For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.

For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry.

For beautiful hair, let a child run his/her fingers through it once a day.

For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone.

People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone.

Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you will find one at the end of each of your arms.

As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands; one for helping yourself, and the other for helping others.

Thank you Ms. Audrey

audrey_hepburn15

What type of woman am I?

April 6, 2009 - Leave a Response

I AM A Lovely Lady.

You are lovely and caring. You help others and spread out a lot of sympathy. Your life aim maybe is to serve the people. But your weakness is that you forget about yourself, your own needs. All your time is hold back for your friends and family. You are always there for people in trouble. Ready for any emergency. You make a lot of sacrifices just to be a good human. But every woman has her needs, her longings and a destiny. Don’t loose yourself in work or curing other people’s souls. You will have your own problems in your life. Another problem is that you don’t say your opinion when it’s right and important to say it. People trample onto your soul if you are always so kind and lovely and helpful. They will play on you. Though you should try to relax more and enjoy your life, you should not loose the gift that was given to you to help others . Not everyone is created this way… You are uniqe and rare!

I AM A Lovely Lady.

ok.

March 31, 2009 - Leave a Response

I’m coming to terms with my singleness and losing an important person in my life. Yes I’m still and will always be sad because I feel like I lost a major piece of me but God continues to carry me and helping me grow stronger each and every second of the day. I always like to reflect on what I could have changed so we would be together, but I think things happen for a reason. I’ll never forget him saying, “You dated me so you can realize what a good man is.” A. I have realized what it feels like to have a good person in your life. B. I just wish the goodness could have stayed longer. Some days I feel like God was punishing me because I was putting this boy infront of Him. I also think maybe I was taking advantage of my blessing which I did. I dunno I just know that this is another lesson learned.

I’ve been reading my new devotional called, “Living Single”, and it’s about singleness, coping, and being happy with the single life. I sometimes tear up because I do not want to be single forever. However if it is in God’s plan then I will follow it. I pray night and day that God will bring a good man, my good man (RJ), back into my life. Like I said before right now I’m loving God and doing what all is best for me. I’m trying to find my happiness on my own. I’ve been searching for it for awhile and I believe daily I become more and more happier about my life. I’ve grown in God and His Word and also when it comes to my emotional/mental state. Like I tell myself daily…I’m going to be ok..God will get me through it all.

PS-Please keep me in your prayers. I have SOOO many projects due in April and Texas Relays is this week…AAAHHHH!!! Pray for me. =)

Becoming Justified by Christ

March 15, 2009 - Leave a Response

Church is my therapy. God is my soul, heart, mind, my everything. He gets me and loves me even when I make the same mistakes over and over again. He never leaves me and I need to always remember that.

Justify- (v.) to declare free of blame

Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.
Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.

Titus 2:2-8

The first thing the sermon started out with is as young people we need to listen and seek advice from the older people in our church. They have been through and/or know what we as  young people are facing so don’t be afraid to talk to them and listen to them.

He then takes the sermon to Genesis 6 talking about the story of Noah and the flood. His main message was becoming a child of Christ and following his commands. What I got from the message was that when I became a child of God and accepted Him into my heart, believed in Him, confessed of my sins, and then was baptized into the water; that God has forgiven me for every single little minute thing I’ve ever done. He JUSTIFIED me. I always forget that. I always think I’m a horrible person for the things I’ve done to myself, friends, family, and even in my relationship and think it can never be change. I often feel lonely and feel like he’s given up on me. God has wiped it all away and treats me like I’m still the perfect person he’s always seen me as and allows me to make corrections. I know he gets frustrated when I get so down on myself and also when I’m not correcting my errors however he helps me, sticks with me, and continues loving day in and day out. He’s one of the few people that actually gets me and I praise, thank, and honor Him for that.

This is the account of Noah. Noah was a righteous man, blameless among the people of his time, and he walked with God.

Genesis 6:9

Noah did everything just as God commanded him.

Genesis 6:22

I am a good person. I am a good woman in Christ. Yes I mess up and fall short sometimes but he always picks me up, wipes my knees, and we continue this journey together again.

I was listening to this song on my way home from church and it really touched me. The words hit to how I’ve been feeling and I don’t need to worry because He is always going to help me.

Have you ever been so down, down,
that you don’t really know what to say;
you tried and tried to do what’s right, right,
and it seems more stuff comes your way.
So you unplug all the phones,
just wanna be left alone, praying for a better day.

Chorus:
Then I hear your sweet voice, (don’t worry).
Will you be there, (in a hurry).
You know I’ve been hurt before, (I see you).
Don’t wanna be hurt no more, no, no, (never leave you no),
don’t worry, don’t worry, don’t worry.

Verse 2:
See people always talk about ‘bout the things
that they’ve been going through,
but you can’t tell how me I feel, feel,
until you walk in my shoes.
See, I’m tired of being tired, fake people all around,
want someone to love me for me (me).

Chorus:
Then I hear your sweet voice, (don’t worry).
Will you be there, (in a hurry).
You know I’ve been hurt before, (I see you).
Don’t wanna be hurt no more, no, no, (never leave you no),
don’t worry, don’t worry, don’t worry.

Bridge:
When the rainbow cannot be found,
and so called best friend, you’re not around,
I open my eyes and realize You were always there.

Chorus:
Then I hear your sweet voice, (don’t worry).
Will you be there, (in a hurry).
You know I’ve been hurt before, (I see you).
Don’t wanna be hurt no more, no, no, (never leave you no),
don’t worry, don’t worry, don’t worry.